Had my car serviced yesterday, and requested a 2.00pm pickup since I had the kids’ school run to do afterwards.  I arrived on the dot to discover my car wasn’t ready, half an hour later in the waiting room I explained the situation to an assistant, and she got things moving…so why the delay?

Well, a bar on the luggage rack had come loose during the detailing/waxing process and bounced down onto the bonnet/hood (Brit/American speak), scratching and denting it in two places.  My main concern (as the female assistant could plainly see) was that I was going to be late picking my girls up from school and so got things moving, giving me a replacement car for the interim.  The damage required that my car be taken to the paint shop, so would take a day or two.

I had spent 20 minutes or so whilst in the waiting room reading the first part of Seka Nikolic’s book, ‘You Can Heal Yourself’.  This was a book I had been waiting for and had just arrived in the mail.  So, I had been immersed in the world of one of the most powerful Bio-Energy healers on the planet, whilst the guy waiting to tell me that the front paintwork of my car had been trashed was probably putting off the moment and dreading it.  A hard thing to do!  I think I preferred my experience to his.

So, when finally explaining the situation he was somewhat breathless, and then I noticed that another coworker was standing by (which could have been his boss - not sure), and they were both apparently waiting for something.  So, I took a breath and then accepted the substitute vehicle.  I was so focused on being concerned that my kids would left waiting and getting upset, that it didn’t occur to me until afterwards that they were probably waiting for some kind of explosion of angry energy from me!

Will Bowen, in his book ‘Complaint Free Relationships’, suggests that when a customer care problem arises and you are the customer, it’s a good idea to start the conversation with the person helping using the words “You may not be aware of this but…”  It helps release the emotional and energetic charge for both of you dealing with the situation as something separate from your bodies, even if it’s an emotional issue for you.  Then, any emotion expressed is more likely to be dealt with in the energy of mutual respect. 

So, while I signed off for my substitute car, I could sense that the guy had a relaxed somewhat, and he mentioned that they’d never had a luggage rail come off before (somehow the bolts were missing, who knows how).  My response was “That must have given you guys a fright, huh?”.  I saw the last of the tension leave him as he breathed out some more, and he agreed wholeheartedly!

So when working on your Personal Energy Practice, a great place to start noticing where your energy goes is when you are put in a position of being asked to complain.  The Western economy has a culture of ‘customer service’, which is a wonderful thing, an aspect of that however is that we are encouraged to complain even if only a few minutes of waiting is required and Customer Service Assistants are focused and fully trained in any number of ways to apologize for any lack of service.  What if you could shift this energetic exchange to one where the energy exchange between you is less awkward and ultimately pleasant?

In order to experience this for myself I took Will Bowen’s Complaint Free challenge 2 years ago, where I sent off for and wore the Complaint Free purple bracelet for 21 days without verbalising a complaint.  Granted, it took me 3 months to complete the challenge (if you complain, switch the bracelet to the other wrist and start over!), but I really enjoyed the energy that was released from going through this process.  I had an experience in Disneyland where it was very hot and we were in a food line, the line was taking a while and two people either side of me were complaining about the wait.  They asked me to comment on the situation, so I showed them the bracelet and said “Sorry, I can’t complain, I’m taking the challenge!”.  It was a very freeing feeling to avoid spending my energy that way, especially on a hot day.

So in your Personal Energy Practice, consider the nature and energy of complaining.  Would a few deep breaths enable you to move past a pre-programmed response to one where you can honor the person who has the role of helping you?  I can guarantee that they will feel the difference!

Complaint Free website: www.acomplaintfreeworld.org

Seka Nikolic: www.sekanikolic.com

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